Changing Perspectives

I have spent a large part of the past decade working with traumatized youth in a cognitive behavioral program focused on helping them to address trauma and learn new and healthier ways of functioning in life. With all that repetition I did not view myself as an authority but I did feel that I had a pretty good grasp on things. Now all those tools and techniques are teaching me how to function in my life. I have come to accept a basic truth.

Any form of abuse or traumatic life event, creates brain trauma.

I have nothing to base this on but my own experiences. From my work with abused youth and experiencing the trauma of my brain tumor and surgery, the effects created are the same. The results and even the treatment methods are remarkably similar.

1. Predictability. Traumatized youth cannot handle change. At all. You must warn, prepare, and follow through in as predictable a way as possible. You follow a daily schedule with almost religious fervor trying to decrease the anxiety and acting out behavior that they will engage in if distressed. You first begin with a written schedule posted for anyone to see. Then advise verbally prior to the activity or change of activity that a change is coming. Then you follow through as consistently as possible. If a change needs to be made, you notify, include them in decisions, and allow processing time before expecting a positive response.

2. Clarity. Clear, concise and simple instructions are necessary to helping youth complete any requested task. Suggestions for treatment include simple language and no more than 5 steps to the task. Some individuals need even fewer steps. For example, right now, I can maybe handle two steps if they are simple and non stressful.

3. Surprises. Nope. No, nada, never. Please see "Predictability." Any form of unexpected activity or surprise is potentially triggering. Anxiety levels increase and you have lost any potential for progress for the foreseeable future. This is not intentional on the part of the person experiencing the anxiety, it just is. The brain cannot learn and function unless calm and relaxed. Surprises eliminate that calm and create a state that the individual now needs to process before moving forward with healing. It is not unreasonable to expect this to take time and effort. Effort that someone used to abuse and trauma will refuse to make unless they view the benefit as "worth it."

I have also found that no two responses and reactions are the same. Even two people involved in the same event will have different physical and emotional responses. What we can do as support systems is to be compassionate. We can create a safe space for healing and we can self monitor to ensure that we are not furthering the traumatic cycle.

Compassion, awareness, and empathy will work to create an environment where healing can take place and where those who need the blessing of healing can find respite and acceptance.

God bless and keep you.