Some Day

Brain tumors become a game of "some day". For many Some day will be surgery. Some day they will have a seizure. Some day they will lose memory or life function.

Numbness. Pain. Disorientation. Fatigue. Double vision. Hearing loss. All these can occur any time in any way for brain tumor patients, benign or cancerous. Surgery is often reserved for those cases where, to not go forward, guarantees death. Radiation and chemotherapy may offer hope and relief for some, but not all cases will benefit.

You could say I was one of the fortunate ones. Instead of years of some day, everything happened so fast that some day was today.

Now my some day consists of creating a life post craniectomy. Some day I will not shake. Some day I will be asked a question and know the answer without thinking about it. Some day I will drive again. Some day I will laugh and run with my children. Some day I will not be in pain.

As you can see, it becomes easy to get lost in some day. I try to focus on today, on now.

It's not always easy.

There are times where holding on to today, this moment, is all I can do. But I hope. I hope for healing, for growth. I hope that none of my loved ones will have to walk this journey.

I respect those that support their family, that hold loved ones when they wake up lost and confused.

Most of all, I respect these warriors. They wake up every morning, never knowing what will happen, knowing that anything is possible, and they choose to live. Every moment they choose life. Past the pain, seizures, anxiety and unknowns they choose to live a life you will know nothing about. (Thank God you don't, this journey is not for the faint of heart.)

They live around you, these warriors. Mothers, grandmothers, fathers and friends. They live quietly. Not making waves. Getting up and living their life, the best way they can. They work and play, laugh and love. Through all this they know how fleeting it all can be. But they still do it, every day, because it is not yet some day and they are here today.

God bless and keep you.