Costuming as Therapy

I haven't talked much about Cosplay and how it relates to recovery from brain surgery, mainly because I am still really limited in my abilities. I still need to rest frequently and have to miss out on activities that mean a lot, simply because I can't handle it. I have had to pass on opportunities to participate in things like the Cancer Walk and activities at children's hospitals because I can't cope yet.

I found Cosplay a short year before my brain surgery. I have always loved theatre costume and make-up design. I took classes for theatre make-up. When I was a child my mom did costuming for a children's theatre as well as helping our local high school drama club with costumes. I often was roped into helping, and I loved it. I have made elaborate costumes for Halloween for years. After having children I added their costumes to my own.

In 2014 I attended my first comic convention. There were adults, in costume, not on Halloween. Who were these people? They were having a blast. I wanted to have fun too. To make a costume and show off what you had done to someone who understood your level of work? Sign me up please!

I had just begun to work on my first costume, the wicked queen from Disney's Snow White. Then the words "You have a large brain tumor, we are rushing you to another hospital for emergency surgery."

That first day I was freaking out. I began to list the things I potentially would never get to do. I would never get to finish my queen, never start on Snow White. I had no idea what my life was going to be like. In that moment of panic I reached out to an online community of peers all involved in Cosplay. I asked for ideas for costumes that I could wear with an awesome and potentially highly visible head scar.

The answers rolled in. That night, after visitors had gone, I developed the initial stages of my cross-gender Punisher and Jubilee from X-Men. In the weeks following my surgery I compiled the individual pieces needed, some were already in my closet and needed only minimal adjustment. Other pieces I found online for low cost.

I had found the ability to make myself into a super hero and an anti-hero. What better analogy for someone going through a life altering surgery and rehabilitation? Cosplay and costuming gave me something to work for. Something to take joy in. A loved one said recently, "It gave you a tie to the future. Something without any expectation or pressure."

This journey has been eventful and challenging but finding something to hold on to is vital. Find hope. Find a cause for the future. Find something that gives you joy.

God bless and keep you.