Humbled

Wow.

You ask and God answers. This past month has been filled with ups and downs as I both face my six month craniversary (a term coined by measuring the time from ones craniotomy) and accept the limitations still present past the physical healing stage. As my speech pathologist says, that is ok, now we know what functional healing still needs to occur. What I have present at this time is what I will be working to slowly heal, and slow is the word of the day.

This has been especially challenging as I have been putting things in perspective over the holiday season. I have been blessed with the most incredible experiences. The first was the offer of a ride home from the store. It was cold but I had forgotten to ask my husband to pick up some basic necessities for the week, things we need and use everyday. Upon leaving the store my son tripped and fell. he was unhurt but looked at me and said "I wish we didn't have to walk." Mere moments later another shopper, Kristin, had pulled her car to the side of the road. We fit the wagon in the back of her SUV and rode the remaining short distance home.
Now, would I normally accept the offer of a ride from a stranger home? No. This felt different and coming so closely on the heels of my sons comment felt much like God saying "Hey, I know. I'm still here. You are not alone. I will never leave you."

Last night it was the spontaneous visit from a friend that touched my heart. It reminded me of all I am blessed with. Sometimes remembering and reviewing how this all took place reminds me how very personal and real is God's presence in our lives. It is easy to feel cut off and disconnected. I know many feel alone and lost. Please, talk to someone. He is there. He is real. Sometimes He is silent, not because he is not speaking, because we are using earplugs.

The last and final moment that touched me, well, I would argue with the sentiment but a letter, penned from a neighbor I have never before met. For the sake of openness I will include the entire content. I accept that this is an opinion, because I feel acutely all my shortcomings, but I wonder how often others really do see us as God intends. We are much harder on ourselves than God would ever be.

"Woman with the cane-
I am a neighbor, almost a stranger but I have come to be familiar with you as you walk to school with your kids each morning. I am learning of your kindness, your unique and loving parenting abilities and most of all your beauty inside that shows with all of your loving expressions. You have a joy for life. You look forward to greeting the day with a smile in the sunshine. You have dedication to your health, to your children and you are teaching them to keep their promises by going to school each day. I have seen you on good days and bad. I have seen you on warm days and cold. I have seen you walk with ease some days and discomfort the next, all while teaching me with your quiet but powerful example that has inspired me to be better. your children follow you because they love you. They smile and look into your supportive caring eyes as they talk about their dreams. You hold their hands and travel in safety on your journey together learning, laughing as you go. The cold never seems to dampen your determination. Your children are loyal to you, they follow you not only as their leader, but also their most trusted friend. Daily you have taken confidence in your direction. I don't know much about your story, but I see your ending. You will always be honored, and cherished for your example. You have let your journey shape you into a beautiful creation, much like all the beautiful creations you go out to see on your walks. You are my most memorable and touching part of the daily routine I pick each day and your life has becomes very important to me. You are leaving a greater footprint in the world than you know. -Love, Kiowa valley Girl"